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A person sitting in an empty sports stadium. Make Monday Matter.Loneliness

Chances are you have felt lonely.

Most of us do at some point. There are many different reasons for this and sometimes there’s no obvious case – it’s just how we feel!

It’s important to remember that lots of people experience similar feelings and that they can pass.

Understanding your reasons for feeling lonely can help you identify and manage these feelings.

There are things you can try that may help. Support is also available if you’re finding it hard to cope with stress, anxiety or depression.

Read our advice if you or someone you know is affected by loneliness.

Get involved with our #MakeMondayMatter movement by following our socials including Facebook and Instagram. Tell us how you are getting on. #LessLonely.


A woman sitting on a chair with her knees up in front of her. She is resting her chin on her hands and looking out of the window. The woman looks sad.Who is affected by loneliness?

Anyone of any age can be affected by loneliness.

Older people are especially vulnerable to social isolation while young people aged 16 to 34 are one of the most at-risk groups for experiencing loneliness.

Loneliness is often linked with things that could prevent you spending time with other people, such as:

  • living or working alone
  • retirement
  • illness or disability
  • bereavement (losing someone or something)
  • moving to a new area, job, school or university
  • social anxiety (social phobia)
  • staying at home to look after a new baby
  • caring full-time for someone you live with

But remember

You don’t have to be on your own all the time to feel lonely. You can experience loneliness:

  • whether you are single or in a relationship
  • if your are spending time with friends or family
  • whether you live in a city or a rural area
  • when you are in a room with lots of people you know

You may feel lonely occasionally, such as on particular days, dates or times of the year. Chronic loneliness is when you feel lonely all the time.

Signs or symptoms of loneliness

As well as feeling isolated, loneliness can have physical symptoms and can affect your behaviour.

This could include:

  • getting nervous about or avoiding going to social events
  • change your daily routines, like stop cooking for yourself, caring about your appearance or getting up early
  • find it difficult to get to sleep or stay asleep

If loneliness is very severe or lasts a long time, it might increase the risk of some physical conditions such as dementia and mental health conditions such as stress, anxiety, low mood or depression.

Try not to use alcohol, cigarettes, gambling or drugs to relieve loneliness; these can all contribute to poor mental health.

Tips for dealing with loneliness

It’s good to talk

Chat regularly with friends or family.

Social media apps like WhatsApp are also a good way to keep in touch, but try not to compare yourself to others on social media. We never know what others are gong though.

Admitting you feel lonely can be hard. Talking more openly about how loneliness affects you can really help.

Join a group

No matter what your interest, there’s probably a group, club or class for it: knitting to netball, woodwork to walking, bridge to Bollywood and everything in between.

Search on the intranet or social media for groups or ask at your local library or community centre.

Do what you enjoy

Filling your time with things you enjoy can stop you from focussing on your loneliness. This could be reading, listening to a podcast, baking, getting outdoors or even cleaning!

Find free and affordable activities near you.

Volunteer

Volunteering is a great way to meet people and help others at the same time, which will make you feel good too.

There’s countless volunteering opportunities in Greater Manchester. No matter what your age, or how much free time you have, there’s lots of ways to fit it into your life.

Find out more on our volunteering page.

Help and support

NHS Every Mind Matters has lots advice on dealing with loneliness.

If you need more support, you can get free talking therapies like cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) on the NHS.

You can refer yourself directly to a talking therapies service without a referral from a GP.

Find an NHS talking therapies service.

See a GP if:

  • you’re struggling to cope with stress, anxiety or a low mood
  • you’ve had a low mood for more than 2 weeks
  • things you’re trying yourself are not helping
  • you would prefer to get a referral from a GP

Call NHS 111 or ask for an urgent GP appointment if:

  • you need help urgently, but it’s not an emergency

You can also use the British Sign Language (BSL) NHS 111 service or call 18001 111 using the Relay UK app or a textphone.

Call 999 or go to A&E now if:

  • you or someone you know needs immediate help
  • you have seriously harmed yourself – for example, by taking a drug overdose

Loneliness at Christmas

A giant Father Christmas sitting on Christmas present towers over pedestrians in Manchester city centre.Feelings of loneliness can feel more intense during the festive season.

You might be alone on Christmas for different reasons, such as the death of a loved one, living far from relatives or because of social isolation.

If you have social anxiety disorder (SAD) and don’t have close relationships with family or friends, loneliness at Christmas can be particularly hard.

Tips for dealing with loneliness at Christmas

Take part in social activities

Look out for community events near you.

If you’re in hospital or a care home, see what activities are running over Christmas that you can join.

 

Stay in touch

If you can’t be with the people you want to see in person, arrange a phone or video call to catch up with them on Christmas day.

Let people know if you're struggling

It can help to talk to someone you trust about how you’re feeling.

If you are anxious about reaching out, remember that other people who are alone on Christmas may feel isolated, lonely and nervous about calling on you too.

Plan ahead

Think about how you’d like to spend your time over Christmas. Think about all the things you enjoy doing – or never usually have time to do.

There may be some Christmas specials on TV, a film or boxset you’ve been meaning to watch. Or maybe there’s a walk you’ve always meant to do.

Speak to a healthcare professional

If social anxiety has left you alone and feeling lonely on Christmas, vow speak to a healthcare professional soon and get a handle on your anxiety.


Loneliness at university

The impressive neo-Gothic entrance arch to Manchester University.Going to university is an exciting time for many people. For other people, it can bring about feelings of loneliness or isolation.

These feelings are completely normal. Your college or university may offer wellbeing or mental health support. Student services or the students’ union (or other student body) can give you information about what’s available – make sure you check the university or college website too.

Student Space

Student Space is a mental health and wellbeing platform designed to bridge any gaps in support for students.

It also has tips and advice on friendships and social life.

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